Sex refers to all acts that can sexually arouse you. Sex is more than sexual intercourse (penetrative sex). It also includes things such as kissing, caressing, fingering, and oral sex. You can also have sex with yourself. This is called masturbation.
Sexuality is a central part of human life. It is a normal and positive way to express yourself. Sexuality involves not only sex but also other matters. For example: sexual pleasure and intimacy, anatomy and having children, as well as taboos and values on sexual orientation.
Reasons for having sex
You can have sex for various reasons. For instance, because you want to:
- have children;
- experience sexual pleasure;
- express love and other feelings;
- experience intimacy;
Different ways of having sex
You can have sex in many different ways:
- sexual intercourse
- caressing
- cuddling
- kissing
- stimulating the erogenous zones on the body.
You can have sex with someone else or with yourself (masturbation).
Sex is not only about the right techniques. It is also important and pleasurable to pay attention to the feelings and wishes of the other person, to share intimacy and to create the right atmosphere.
Experiment and find out what you and your partner like best. Talk with your partner about your desires and feelings. You can also experiment on your own.
Sex can be different every time.
Our sex lives can change during the lifetime. For example: because our body or sexual desire changes as we go through different life events. This is normal. Some people do not have sex for a shorter or longer period of time.
Different relationships and sex lives
There are different contexts in which people explore sexual activities. Different relationships depend on our values and comfort level that influence what types of sexual activities we are open to or desire, when, how often and whether we want to engage in sexual activities. For example: some people have sex before marriage (casual, dating, serious relationship, spouse, monogamous, polyamorous, friends with benefits, etc), and others wait until afterwards. Some people only have one partner, others have several.
People of the same sex can also be attracted to and have sex with each other.
Sex is not…
- holding hands
- hugging
- a test or check at the doctors (e.g. breast check or cervical screening test)
- when a doctor or nurse puts in your contraception
